Jun 26, 2012

good girl goes bad

Im just another person in need of God`s mercy ... 
and this is some of my life experiences..
When I fist heard of Christ I was about 12 years old ,back in the day I couldnt understand what  being a christian was about, I thought going to church everysunday and behaving in front of ppl was it,I basically felt into "religion" and it went that way for the nxt few yrs.
As I started growing up things started to change because at that time I couldnt undesrtand the seriousness of following Christ , I wanted to do things that people of my age was doing like clubbing, dating, drinking ,etc. (not always what evrybody says and does means its the right thing to do ) ,at home I didnt have the freedom that I wanted so I decided to move out ,this is when the nightmare begins.
My life was a complete mess, all those things soon become normal to me and I wanted more, I wanted to be famous and Rich, I was dating this guy that used to tell me "money by any means" and I believed that so he convinced me on doing all kinda crazy things for money, that relationship failed I thank God he pulled me away of that guy quick , but still I didnt want to submit to God!
A while after I enrolled in music school I wanted to be a singer not because I actually liked music but because I wanted to be rich and famous as I was doing that I got caught up in a relationship with this dude that did not know God and with bad habits(porn watching,smoking,etc.), knowing all that I still went in it, I thought I could change him smh , I put my job, and career on the side in order to be with him , despite all that, things went wrong so wrong that we had to break apart. I found myself pregnant and I aborted my child, I was caugh up in my ex`s bad habits,I was feeling depressed, with a lot of hate towards him and more terrible feelings,I felt helpless for the veryfirst time....(ppl usually make decisions on their own without consulting GOD first , then when things go wrong we like to complain to Him)
 ...and it wasnt until then when I realized that I had been going in cirlcles all this time and that I had put God out of my life ! so I decided to turn back to Him.
I had this hunger for God that I never had before I started seeking for him started to read and meditate on his word (the bible) and he always faithful answered me. 
Then,everything started making sense I discoverd the importance of making God #1 in my life and living under his rules, the importance of having a personal relationship with Him and much more... he opened my spiritual eyes(Job 42:5), took my pain away , the bad habits everything, today I can say in God I`ve found TRUE LOVE, TOTAL SATISFACTION , HAPPINESS and more..
 I let God wk on me and transform my life and the process continues I`m in need of Him daily !!
My life has a new meaning now and the goal is Christlikeness! (2Co.5:17) (Ephesians4:13)


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